Britney/Alicia: singles
August 31, 2007Why am I choosing Britney over Alicia Keys? I’m not asking this rhetorically. Someone please explain this fucking shit to me. What the hell is going on in my mind right now. I feel so betrayed by my own senses.
What in the good fucking crap of the world is going on?!? I blame it on expectation. Everyone expects gold from Alicia Keys. Everyone expected crap from Britney Spears. Now I won’t call ‘Gimme More’ gold, but I’d dance the fuck out of it in a club. I would, however, turn the station if I heard ‘No One.’ Or purposefully crash my car.
To Britney: Introducing oneself followed by ‘bitch’ has been done a fabillion times. First by Dave Chapelle. Then the other fabillion minus 1 times by every frat boy on that cruise I went on in 2004. And look at what happened to Dave. But you already went fucking crazy. So Ima stop.
To Alicia: I’m not angry. I’m not, I swear. Sure, you can try to sing bad on purpose because you want to capture the Lauren Hill MTV unplugged sound. I have to say though, not a great move. After that live performance, I think Lauren ended up hanging herself by her dread locks. Also, the synthesized accordion… No.
